Sunday, June 24, 2007

Searching For a Rainbow


Have you ever had a time when you weren’t sure of your place in the world? Ever want to be some place other than your job, or feel lonely when surrounded by people? Have you ever felt like you really were not number one is someone else’ eyes? For certain, I am not unique in feeling this way. It’s like someone looking outside their den window, and seeing the same tree everyday, but then one day they don’t see the tree at all because they are so use to it being there. Too consumed with their own job, and demands of life, people miss out on relationships all the time with spouses, friends and family, because of self-centeredness.

Maybe it’s because we focus on ourselves, and loose sight of what’s right in front of us, being offered, rather than make a effort to genuinely care about another’s dreams, hopes and desires. How often do we dare yield a large part of ourselves to show someone that they matter more than anything else? Far too often we assume we know what the other person is thinking, and we believe we know more than they do about what was said in a conversation or an email taken the wrong way.

There’s a yield sign for traffic that I face every day to turn into our office parking lot. I have the right of way because the sign clearly states other drivers are to yield to U-turn traffic and it is the only way into our office park. Several times in the last few weeks, a man in a black Mercedes would not yield to me, almost hitting me. One day last week, he yelled--I blew my horn, but he proceeded to turn in front of me, then jerking his car over into my lane nearly coming to a complete stop as it if to scare me, all the while, shooting me the bird. Really nice man, I thought sarcastically. Quickly, I pointed in the direction of the yield sign that he had. Let me tell you, it unnerved me, and I was shaking by the time I got to my desk. Road Rage, nothing more, very real. Who knows, he may have made good his threats, because he was yelling and gesturing expletives at me. This was the same man who had done this to me several times this year.

This past Thursday morning, I couldn’t believe that we wound up at the intersection again at the same time. I shivered, he was moving fast, but apparently he had decided to acquiesce to let me turn into the office park, for whatever reason, barely giving me a second thought. I breathed a sigh of relief.

Life is about yielding to others, like it or not, especially if you have taken offense at something you thought someone meant, and you were entirely wrong. I have yielded all my life to almost everyone, but today I want to take care of me and my heart, and not be in constant worry about how someone perceives who I am. I’m longing to be held close to someone’s heart, that genuinely cares about my needs and dreams. I suggest you listen to your heart. As for me, I’m looking for a Rainbow…..

6 comments:

Lloyd and Shirley said...

I always look forward to your writings - you give us so much detail in a few short words - I can see vividly your explanations.

Just to let you know, we sold our house in Parker in just 3 days - now we are doing our final packing to move up North. I found my rainbow - great friends who care for each other and always want to help you whenever - did not think I would find that ever in my life - Northwestern Nebraska is my rainbow and I'm looking forward to many years with many new people. Thanks so much my dear friend for sending the postcard about the book mentioned in your past book review. I bet your rainbow is coming around the corner!!

Shirley

brendalottakamaggiebrendan said...

Hi, dear friend. I'm so glad you enjoy reading my posts. I'm about to have more free time to do that. I have resigned from my job to concentrate on writing. I have one week left. I'm tickled that you are so excited about Nebraska, but you will miss Colorado. I know that I still do. There is no place on earth like it. Thanks for sending me pictures! Wishing you all the best in Nebraska and your new home.

kellymarielong@comcast.net said...

Dear Maggie Brendan,
I think you should be writing magazine articles because your writing is very engaging and your perceptions are so suited to everyday life experiences! Hmmmm....maybe you should think about writing more novels...or more screenplays......! I will now post more often since I have found the way here!
Love,
Kelly

brendalottakamaggiebrendan said...

Kelly, you know you just always inspire me to be reach beyond my thinking...thanks for your support and friendship!

Anonymous said...

NOW let me tell you something chickadee, you say there is no place like COLORADO well I beg you differ...there is no place on this here earth like WYOMING those TETONS just make my heart explode with joy...so beautiful..that thar are no words to express just how beautiful they really are...you go and see them now ya' hea...


from your old sista.....Dianne
I'm the one with da brains.....:))

brendalottakamaggiebrendan said...

Are you sure you're not Jeff Foxworthy's sista??
I can only testify to what I've see so far. Guess I'll have to mosey on up that way one of these days; and get thar by the way of Kathy's!